Happy Birfday F!

Happy birthday Franny! It's not as easy to celebrate as it used to be, but I gotta recognize your day. :)

(Sorry about the poor picture. It's from the Mizz's zero point naught megapixel camera. D's always sleeping in the room with the good pics.)

Remember the point of the day

Maybe it's a good idea Dad's not on Facebook

Mom's okay, I suppose.  She'll never post anything about burping. :)

Erin Go Braghh

(pinch)

Congratulations 44

Well, Barrack, you finally did it.  Good luck with the mess you've inherited.  If anyone can handle it (besides Franny), you seem like the guy.  You've broken an historic barrier today, but as the first Hawaiian president, you're setting a shining example for the world.  (If I were you though, I'd run over to the Supreme Court and redo that oath before the wingnuts find someone to read the Constitution to them.)

Merry Christmas 2008!

Merry Christmas, everybody! I wish I could be with the rest of my family today, but I'm still very thankful for what I've got right here with me...

My calves are still sore

This weekend, we took the family out for the Providence Bridge Pedal. This is an annual event, in which the city closes half of each bridge for exclusive bike traffic, including the two interstate bridges. This does not amuse drivers, who are stuck with detours and delays all morning. Too bad. Actually, due to the fact that one of our kids only has a plastic tricycle and the other one barely has feet, we chose to do the Bridge Stride instead, which only covers two bridges. I'm not sure how many walkers there were, but there were 18,000 total walkers and bikers. The Mizz rode in the backpack (hence my sore calves), and D rode in the stroller and slept, the lazy bum. Here is a picture of us setting out.


And here we are heading up an off-ramp onto I-405. This felt wrong in more ways than the sign can convey. For an added dose of wrong, marvel at the optical illusion created by the confluence of the dark pad on the backpack, my cargo pockets, and the Mizz's shoes, making my backside look positively enormous. Perhaps I should walk on the freeway a little more often.


Here is a view from the top of the Freemont Bridge. This was pretty cool, since you usually see it at 55 mph, when you are not up there for long and you really ought to be watching the road anyway.


And finally, I don't understand all the fuss about closing Starbucks stores. We can get lattes in the middle of a frickin interstate highway down here. High speed drive-through is the wave of the future.

Check out my excuse for not blogging!

OK. I admit that a month is a long time to go without posting, but you have to admit, this isn't too bad an excuse. Welcome Baby D, as of 5/8. Incidentally, that's my old hat he's wearing, from 1970-something. It's a tad small now.

The new guy is pretty awesome. Aside from an early bout of not getting bigger fast enough, he's doing really well. He's pretty easygoing most of the time. He doesn't need to be swaddled much to sleep, and most of his wide-awake times are during the daytime. Feeding is not going as smooth as it should, but he gets away with it by being crazy cute. The Mizz thinks he's awesome, and does not appear to be blaming him for the fact that his world has been rocked. Mizz is always wanting to hug him and look at him and make sure that the light over his bed is turned off so he can sleep. That last one is a really big deal, as the Mizz does not turn off lights without a really good reason.

I've been staying at home whenever the Mizz doesn't have daycare, but that's about to change tomorrow. It'll be Franny's first time dealing with both boys by herself, which will likely be interesting, to say the least. I won't be far away at least, for all that's worth.

There have been all sorts of things I kept thinking I should be posting, but time has usually been monopolized by one or both boys, sleeping, and, when possible, getting other things done that really need to get done, like pay bill and make sure the house doesn't come falling down around us. I even had to pay someone to do a crappy job mowing my lawn yesterday. It had been maybe 4 weeks and looked like an abandoned lot. It pains me to pay anyone to do something I think I should do myself, and especially mowing the lawn, which I don't even mind that much, but it wasn't getting done and it was the only sunny day for a while, so I suppose I'll live.

I can tell by my conversations with everyone that I have a new kid. Not the obvious, "How's the new baby?", or "Do you have any pictures?" Those are expected. I'm talking about discussing cervices and nipple pain with my sisters. I'm talking about strangers asking about water breaking and stitches. I mean, if I haven't offered you details about my wife's intimate parts, you probably don't deserve them. Seriously, the women are the worst. They figure new Dad is totally ready, not only to discuss his wife's private issues, but to hear about their recollections of their kids' births and breastfeeding issues from years ago. I'm having to picture things about my coworkers and customers that are definitely not part of my job description.

Other than the new guy and family issues, I'm pretty disconnected from the world these days. I'm aware that Oregon overwhelmingly voted for Obama, although, since I'm not a registered Democrat, nobody asked me. It's sort of amusing that we got so much attention. Usually, Oregon doesn't figure much in national politics, and after last Tuesday, will probably go back to being ignored. It's odd this year. The candidates are now having to pretend that they give a hoot about issues in Guam and Puerto Rico. Resources and effort well spent, I'm sure.

Speaking of resources, we got our economic stimulus payment, $1,500 from Uncle Sam. "Economic stimulus payment" is a much more palatable term than "throwing money at the problem," or "election-year patronization." Seriously, this it the best way the might of the federal government could be used to help the economy???

Of course, gas prices are going up. And food prices. And the sting at the pump. And the rising cost of food. And GAS! And FOOD! In case you hadn't noticed the price of gas and food rising, the local news shows are careful to work it into every story to remind you that gas and food are getting more expensive. Thanks, news media. You're a big help.

The three day weekend all looks the same to me right now, but I am also aware that it's Memorial Day weekend. I'd like to take a moment to remember the servicemen killed in the line of duty whom we are supposed to be memorializing. However, based on the TV, I think I'm just supposed to take that stimulus money and buy a new mattress. Or maybe fill up my gas tank.

Enough with the rambling. It's time to get back to my duty, which mainly consists of washing dishes and pump parts and bottles and such. See you again, in another month. (Sooner, I hope.)

Poor Risk/Benefit Analysis

$1,000 an hour? Seriously??? Actual total cost so far: ~$80,000 plus one rising political career. Still to be counted: legal fees, one wife (I assume), likely fines, and possible jail time. She's attractive, I suppose. Unless I'm missing something though, I guess I'm just not macho enough to think that sounds like good financial decision making.

Way to go Spitzer. I guess they just do scandals bigger in New York than we do out here in Oregon. Our best stuff seems to be garden variety "fact-finding" trips to Hawaii and the like. There was a state representative that was caught with meth after getting in a fight with her ex's new girlfriend or something like that, but I'm pretty sure nobody outside Oregon cared.

What really gets me about this guy is that he spent 8 years as attorney general of New York catching criminals and corrupt politicians using exactly the kind of financial techniques that nabbed him. She must have really been something.

If nothing else, I guess this gives the media something to get excited about besides pretening to care what voters think in otherwise politically irrelevant parts of the country.

(BTW, I can't really vouch for the accuracy of the picture. Yahoo news says it's the right person, but they lifted the picture from MySpace, so who knows?)

Chelada!!!

Clam and tomato together seem bad enough as it is, but I can't think of anything worse with them than Bud Light. Also available in regular Budweiser flavor. I can only assume that I'm not the target demographic.

Lava!

We managed to avoid the rain long enough to find some lava for Franny to perch on.

Yeah, I Rock

I used to be the guy on the left. Then I played the game. Now I understand. (From xkcd.com)

Wisdom

Franny says I gotta post more. So here's some philosophy I found enlightening. As always, click to make it readable.

I have GOT to get me one of these!

Give me one good reason why I don't need a glow-in-the-dark cloned cat. It is one of those irritating long-haired beasts, but then, I'll only be looking at it under a UV lamp anyway.

Happy Birthday Mom!

Happy Birthday Mom! I know it's a day late, but at least this time I can say I was not near a computer yesterday until late at night and I was three hours jet-lagged. Mom's birthday was actually yesterday, and for the record, yes, I did call her, albeit from an airport while I was chasing the Mizz around trying to tire him out for the plane. I'm not sure how coherent the conversation was, but I'm sure she got the gist.

Since it's not polite to call your mother old, I decided to dig around for a picture to make fun of instead. I was originally thinking of a hospital one from around my original birthday with full-on beehive hair, but this one struck me. It struck me because with the chops, the perpetual squint, and the apparent lack of fashion sense, that could be me in the background instead of Dad. (In case you missed it, I'm the short guy in the blue track suit.) I also thought Mom had quite a good look going too until I realized that the glasses, shirt, and even the hairdo would probably be right at home in Portland today. I'm assuming there's some sort of polyester pants action going on too, but that might have to stay in history's laundry heap. Even in Portland, we have standards. Now that I write that, I can safely assume that the Mizz's generation will bring polyester back just to annoy me. Or maybe they'll work with 80's stuff like parachute pants and Miami Vice colors. Whatever it takes to irritate Dad.

Anyway, back to the point. Congratulations on another eventful year, Mom. Happy Birthday!

Northwest Storm

If you haven't seen it yet, this is I-5 near Centralia, Washington. I believe the water has subsided somewhat since this picture, but the road is still covered in a lot of mud that has to be removed before it can be reopened this weekend.

If you're interested in seeing some details of the storm, The Oregonian newspaper has put up an interactive map of various pictures, weather satation reports, etc. I especially like the rain guage and wind speed reports, such as 129 mph in Bay City, Oregon (near Tillamook, of cheese fame). It also shows road closures, but those are current, so some previously closed roads are not shown. Yesterday, the roads from Portland to Astoria, Seaside, and Tillamook were all closed.

I'm not sad we missed this one.

How's traffic in your town?

This elephant apparently got mad during an elephant polo match in Sri Lanka. I can't say that I blame him. (Yanked from Yahoo! photos)

Happy Thanksgiving!

I'm sure this picture is on about 10,000 blogs today. I found it years ago, but I still chuckle a little at it every time.

We had a bunch of people over today, including my folks, with whom we haven't shared Thanksgiving in quite some time. It was nice to have experienced help in the kitchen, although that's not why they were invited. Everything was ready at about the same time, which is something that we don't do so well even if we only have a couple dishes to coordinate. As it was, we had maybe 10 different things to prepare or rewarm. My parents pulled it off despite a snafu with our oven being unknowingly turned off prematurely, which says much more about the design of our oven/timer controls than it does about our kitchen staff. (One start button, but two stop buttons. It still catches us from time to time too.) All in all, a great time, with food compliments all around.

Sesame Street is not normally related to Thanksgiving, but since I found that picture again, I can relate this story. Apparently, Children's Television Workshop is releasing some early seasons of Sesame Street with a warning that they are for adults only due to the behavior of some of the characters. Incidentally, we already own this set, but without the warning. They are definitely from another era. Cookie Monster smokes a pipe (and then eats it), Oscar is REALLY a grouch, and Gordon, a grown man, invites a little girl back to his house for milk and cookies. However, as far as I'm concerned, the only real problem with these old episodes is the disheveled puny-headed Big Bird.

Separated at Birth?: Fonzie edition

Make a fist. Make a fumb. Make a AAAYYYY!

Happy Halloween!

I hope everyone is having a fun Halloween. These are our jack-o-lanterns this year. Tutu helped the Mizz design his, but we just carved it this weekend along with the Mama Pumpkin and the Daddy Pumpkin.

We didn't do candy at home this year, since the Mizz is going down right at prime time. We just left the light off like all the other pathetic anti-social people in our neighborhood, although I did hear someone down the street scaring the crap out of trick-or-treaters. Oh, the memories.

We did take the Mizz out earlier to go trick-or-treating at the mall. He was a dragon, of the Old Navy type. He's a natural. Most of the kids just stood in line and held out their bags like collecting candy was their jobs. But not the Mizz. He delighted in holding his bag (a "happy" skull) at arm's length, and saying, loudly but not screaming, "Twick o tweet!" Sometimes he was several feet away from the person with the candy, and sometimes he was saying it to random trick-or-treaters walking down the hall, but he's getting the idea. Give him time. He got the hang of it after a while and then wouldn't stop. Once we let him eat a couple pieces of candy though, the monster was unleashed and he had a one track mind after that. I also found that young ladies at stores giving out candy in their sexy whatever costumes interact much differently with the old guy and his cute kid after Mama goes off shopping. I wasn't doing research, mind you, just an observation. It does seem that if you're looking to hit it off with someone half your age, for some reason a two year old dressed as a dragon would be a helpful accessory. They still gave out pathetic candy though. Franny snagged the only Reece's cup and there wasn't a Hershey miniature in sight. Just gobs of tootsie rolls and hard candy. You'd think businesses could do better, especially the big boxes. They could have had full size candy bars to give out without putting a dent in their obscene profit margins. Maybe that's not true, but I'm going to imagine it is anyway. I mean, Macy's running out of candy an hour into the event. Seriously. (Sounds like someone's jealous that nobody wants to give him a bag of candy. Poor, sad old man.)

How else does Portland do Halloween? How about a Zombie Walk? Be careful about clicking that. The link might not be too safe for appetites, depending on your zombie/gore tolerance. For the Zombie Walk, a bunch of people gather at Pioneer Courthouse Square at a designated time near Halloween and then stagger around town amusing the locals and freaking our tourists and children. There's something surreal about a video of a bunch of zombies lurching and moaning through Pioneer Place mall and then calmly riding the escalators en masse.